Realising there is a difference between looking bad and feeling you look bad.
The body is an issue much discussed, thought about and people seem to care just that little too much about bodies and body type. There are many issues associated with glorifying one body type as people assume it means shaming another (of course not always the case). Unless you are all about that bass by Meghan Trainer, whereby being a ‘skinny bitch’ is worse than being a bigger woman (come on Meghan don’t write a song about body confidence and then shame another body type). An issue is that whilst people glorify one body type we just can’t seem to get the balance. As soon as one hashtag starts on twitter aiming to promote the larger body type; a new one has to start up promoting the smaller body type.
Body confidence isn’t a size you get to. Size 4’s don’t become confident when they hit size 10 and size 20’s don’t become confident when they hit size 16. It’s all about you and what makes you happy. When you are at a stage whereby you are comfortable; that is body confidence. It isn’t about what other people think. When people try and lose weight they don’t try in order to look good for others, we want to look good for ourselves and body positivity is all about the self, not about anyone else.
There is a huge weight obsession, we use weight to make other’s feel better and also as a way to put ourselves down; “I’m so fat”, “No, I’m way fatter” and we don’t even realise we are doing it- like it even matters that much anyway. People don’t realise that not one body is the same. Whilst your friend may weigh eight stone and you may weigh thirteen stone and while the women in magazines curves or petiteness may be put on show- we can never achieve the exact body someone else has (hence why the media makes it so hard for us to ever be confident in our own skin). We buy workouts in order to look like other people, we all want Tammy Hembrow’s booty workout guide because we want her EXACT figure but we can never ever achieve her exact figure because of how different every body type is. We buy the thinnest woman’s workout DVD rather than a larger woman because we assume she is fitter, when the larger woman’s DVD may be 100% better, just because we want to look like the thinner woman. We concentrate on the images presented to us in this celebrity culture and we actually believe we can look exactly like them. But, why would we want to, why can’t we just look like us and be ourselves.
The point is; weight is the person’s own issue and so we are our own worst enemies. Most people do not care what other people weigh, how their body looks, whether they have small boobs, fake boobs, flab rolls, a flat stomach. We care about what we look like and mostly us alone. Therefore, in order to be confident in our own bodies, we have to find the good things about them. Who cares if your belly flops over your pants a little when your personality is that fucking great. Being body confident is what is inside not the outside- it’s way more about the mind than the actual body.
Being body confident is all about being you. Trying to get those bad ass Beyonce curves whilst having a size A cup and no hips is never going to work, but the other girl or boy who desperately wants to lose her curves will also try. We need to stop trying to be other people and just be ourselves. We care way too much about body image and it’s time to realise that mostly we are the only ones who care about how we look and whilst we feel we look bad in our mind; our bodies don’t. Confidence makes you happier than any diet and any size ever will, even if it seems super hard to find!